Untitled.

Sharp, as a knife..you cut through my sunlight and created the night. The pain spreads like cancer as I pray for an answer. I still cant fathom..its so hard to sleep at night because of my spasmes. Left alone to drown in the tears you've created, I cant even leave the my apartment without looking jaded. Faded..the promises you made. Out dated.. the times that we shared. I often wondered if he even cared. How can someone care in the fashion that you did? Its the truth that you deny and you continue to keep hid.
I try to block out the images in my mind of all the wonderful time that we spent together. And what makes it hard is this is just the beginning of the bad weather. You said you weren't going anywhere.. and yet you did. Lies upon lies...and what did I do to deserve this? I just want an answer. A reason. how can you abandon the one who would always be there? how could you look me in the face and tell me you love me?
I am numb. My heart beats faintly as I lay lifeless, wishing the pain would leave my body. I scream on the inside because my spirit is dying. If you wanted space.. thats all you had to say. If I crowded your space, why couldn't you just say it to my face? If we were moving too fast, why wouldn't you tell me so I could slow down? now all I do is mope around. hoping, praying that this is just a phase. Im torn..days and nights blend and become the deepest haze. Am I wrong for thinking you're my soul mate? Did I scare you away? So many unanswered questions...my mind won't rest. Im constantly thinking of you. wondering what I could have done to make you not want to leave me. This is not fair. I thought I made you happy. Why can't you just tell me the real reason??!! Neglected. Rejected. I knew this would be my demise, something to good to be true...it all was nothing but lies. False promises. False hopes. And the saddest part is I still love you.